The Joy of Ownership

Is the thrill of buying the same as the joy of owning?

Every December, we buy gifts for our friends and family, especially the children. As I watch my children open their gifts, I see the thrill in their eyes. But where are the gifts of yesteryears now? Do they even remember them? As I’ve gotten older, I find myself wondering why we enjoy buying things so much. Is the thrill of buying the same as the joy of owning?

I’ve come to think the real joy of owning something is in using it again and again over time. I have a hoodie I keep coming back to. It’s the one I pick up without even thinking. On some level, I trust it. I rely on it not just for comfort, but for it makes me feel when I step outside. That quiet relationship with each piece is what the joy of ownership feels like to me. So when I buy something new, the thrill isn’t just about having a new piece, it’s the excitement of starting a new relationship.

But how can you enjoy something that won’t last long enough to build a relationship with it? That’s why the quality of the material and the way it’s put together matters so much. With mass-produced pieces, made as quickly and cheaply as possible, it’s hard to become attached to them. We don’t see much value in them, so we don’t really care for them. Why would we, when we can just buy another as soon as it starts to break down?

There are pieces in my wardrobe that I return to without a second thought. Pieces that has sun-faded and softened over the years. A pair of shoes cracking at the creases from constant wear. Seeing and feeling how each piece has aged makes me quietly excited to see how the next one I bring in will evolve.

Every December, I still give my children gifts, but I’m more interested in the few things they might live with than in the pile they tear through in a day. I know I can’t talk them into this. They’ll only start to understand the joy of owning by watching me over the years, seeing which things I keep, repair and come back to.